My Beanie!

My day has been a complete write off since I got the call from the Childrens Hospital saying they'd like to move Raya's MRI to TOMORROW morning at 8am.

It was booked for Tuesday the 15th and though it's only a week sooner, I'm not ready. I kinda just panicked and have done nothing all day but 'think'. Next week my mom was going to come and stay with the other two. Chris would meet me at the hospital to help pass the time. I'd be able to come home and spend the rest of the day comforting Raya and caring for her and making sure all her needs were met without the distraction of everyone else. Now what? Chris is sick. My mom is to busy with work. Chris's parents are comfortable at home and his mom is weak with an illness right now. It sucks. It feels like what was going to be a big giant effort and sacrifice on the part of many that love her is now left in my lap for me to deal with on my own. I feel like I'm facing this dark day alone without support, even though I know it's not true.

No matter the results of the MRI, it changes *us*. If the results are good it changes things. If there are not so good, it changes things. Once we know what we are dealing with we will need to research and plan and do whatever we can to make her joyous life the best and easiest it can be. ! What doesn't change is how much I LOVE HER!!!

I'm thankful for our friends that have called and offered to help. Unfortunately it's hard because I need to leave at 6:45am and that's much to early to drop my kids off at anyones house. Thanks for calling to offer support. It means SO much to us!!!!!

Please pray for peace and comfort for Raya tomorrow. I'm sure it's harder on me than on her. She has no idea about any of it....and it's good that way!