Yesterday the girls and I came to Lethbridge so that they could see their grandparents and cousins. We haven't been here since Christmas and didn't have any plans to come until mid-March or April. Hallie has been asking to come alot over the past few days so we decided it would be good for me to bring them.
I had a great drive down with them. They both slept for a good part of it and it allowed me to listen to MY music and have downtime and time to think. I listened to a song called "Eternity" and it has HUGE meaning for me. When my grandpa was in the hospital I would listen to this song all the way to the hospital and all the way home each time I went to visit. I was usually weeping the entire time but it was so peacefull and made me very sad for myself and really excited for my grandpa. I reminisced about some of the wonderful times we had together and what a great man he was. I have to admit that coming to Lethbridge isn't the same without him being here even though I didn't see him everytime we came.
Listening to this song yesterday brought me to do this excerise...TRY IT.
Imagine yourself for a minute in your "happiest place and your most happiest moment with the people that make you the happiest".
Now, once you have that scenario in your mind imagine how much better that place would be if you had no TEARS! Nothing to cry about...nothing at all. Anything that makes you cry, remove it from your world for a minute.
Now, also take away anything in this world that causes you or has ever caused you PAIN. You are in your "happiest place" with no tears or pain. Imagine what that would be like. If you could live in this situation forever with no tears or pain at all.
Next, take away anything that brings FEAR to your life. For me, that is things like loosing my husband, never seeing my children again, not being good enough, being unfairly judged... To live without those feelings in the back of my mind would be so freeing!
Lastly, imagine your life without the tears, the pain, the fears and the SHAME. Remove anything from your mind that has ever caused you shame of anykind.
What an incredible feeling that will be....and that my friends, is where my Grandpa is. In his happiest place with as much joy as he has every felt in his entire life without tears, pain, fears or shame!!!!
NO more tears,
NO more pain,
NO more fears, and
No more shame
for we will be with You
yes, we will be with You!!!
As much as I love my life right now, it is NOTHING compared to what Heaven is going to be like. It's hard to imagine that.
As I was listening to this particular song, on repeat, and yes, crying yesterday I was thinking of all the things I will leave behind when it is my turn to go to Heaven to spend Eternity with God in a perfect place. It was a great excercise to go through as it made me realize how much I have to be thankful for RIGHT NOW and how incredibly blessed I am.
Here a few things that I have:
a loving husband
two amazing children
a miracle inside of me
a sister who listens all the time
parents that love me
a great job
an incredible amount of great friends
a church where we are comfortable
a nice house in an insane market
people that pray for me and my family
and most of all...I am learning to find CONTENTMENT and it's a great feeling!
John Wesley said a great quote that has been on my mind over the past couple of weeks and I wonder if it was one of my Grandpas favorites, even though I don't even know if he knew of it.
"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can."
